Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Wheelchair and Other "Palusots"


“Ang Kawatang Nagigipit, Sa Wheelchair Kumakapit”

A few months ago, MalacaƱang refuted a statement of Chief Justice Renato Corona that the root cause of his impeachment was the Supreme Court’s adverse decision on the Hacienda Luisita owned by the President’s family.

Presidential Spokesperson Edwin Lacierda vehemently denied and stated that the root cause of Corona’s impeachment was Corona’s “lapdog loyalty” to former President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo as shown by the High Court’s issuance of the TRO against the watchlist order on the former President.

Now that the Impeachment trial is over, many would have to agree  that Corona indeed takes after his “master” for following her “wheelchair” strategy to fish for sympathy.

When all “technicalities” failed, go for the “underdog” approach.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Day Corona Testes-Tified


The "incident" at the Senate Impeachment court where the Chief Justice Renato Corona surprised everyone by his declaration of a waiver allowing most government agencies to access his bank accounts... only to give a pathetic condition later on that all 188 congressmen, who signed his Impeachment complaint, plus a special mentioned Senator Franklin Drilon, would also sign similar waivers, then CJ hurriedly walks out of the courtroom before he could be cross-examined...... was like similar to having sex with your wife at a point where both of you are almost reaching climax, at the peak of intimacy......then all of a sudden your child walks into your room and sees the two of you while in coitous.

When the CJ returned to the courtroom (he probably couldn't leave because the Senate President and presiding impeachment court senator judge Juan Ponce Enrile ordered all Senate doors and gates locked), he was in a wheelchair....like a limp penis several minutes after pleasing himself.

I believe he's far more relieved, while most of us at the courtroom had been abruptly stopped from ejaculating!

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Not Too Gaga Over Lady Gaga


A religious group called Biblemode Youth Philippines is leading a campaign to have Lady Gaga's concerts banned in the Philippines. It said it will start a prayer vigil on Saturday until Lady Gaga arrives in Manila for her two-night concert on May 21 and 22 at the SM Arena.

They are calling Lady Gaga the "anti-Christ," the group criticized Gaga for her skimpy costumes and provocative songs, such as "Judas," which the group said is a direct insult to Jesus Christ.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Barbershop Philosophers


As a child, I went to the nearest barbershop a few blocks away from our house in my hometown.  I remember being fascinated with all the barber stuff. There were several combs of different shapes and sizes, and I won't forget the first time I saw and heard the electric shaver that would be used on my nape when I ask for a "barbers cut" plus the sharp "labaha" or razor that the barber would use on my  .

What I remember most though, was the distinct "manliness" of the place. There were plenty of calendar cum posters on the walls displaying scantily-clad women endorsing alcoholic beverages. The posters, containing beautiful, sexy and voluptuous women, masquerading as calendars were all over the place. In fact it may have been the reason why I got interested in girls at a very young age.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Mister Anonymous


"Why is there a proliferation of Mr. Anonymous in this archipelago?!" says Senator-judge Miriam Defensor Santiago.

I would have to laugh-out-loud if the Senator would take it seriously and consider requiring the Armed Forces of the Philippines (AFP) and Philippine National Police (PNP) personnel to look for "Mister Anonymous" due to a strike three circumstance where evidences coming in are from "anonymous" sources.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Google Translate, Please !


What It Really Means

Chief Justice Renato Corona has quickly made a statement as a response to the testimonies in court of Ombudsman Conchita Carpio Morales at the Impeachment Trial of Chief Justice Renato Corona. The statements were short but vague for it neither denies nor affirms any truth or falsehood. I made Google Translate do the English to Filipino translation (although a bit rough on some), and also tried to explain what they could probably really mean. If only I could read the mind of the Chief Justice, then it would be fun knowing the truth behind his unexplained wealth.

Para sa ikabubuti ng mga hindi gaanong nakakintindi ng salitang Ingles ay minarapat ko na magsalita rin ng tagalog.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Are You MILF Enough?


What better way to get people buzzing than featuring a hip blond mom breastfeeding her post toddler child?

Breastfeeding babies in public causes a stir. People have an issue with nursing in public even with an infant. Here they used a 3-year-old child when most children are weaned between 6 months and a year.  People are up in arms simply because it depicts such an intimate act between a mother and child, - and even more commotion breaks lose when it's a hot blonde that's MILF material.

If the heat of the summer doesn't get you all hot-tempered, well you may get differently "hot" instead seeing the latest magazine cover which has become the talk of the world recently.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Ang Sirena Sa Terminal 3 ng NAIA


Out of This World 
(Sing to the tune of Part of Your World from the Little Mermaid movie)

Looking around here you think
That Claudine’s got everything
I’ve got hubbie Raymart and friends a-plenty
I’ve got Mon Tulfo’s shoeprint and bruises galore
You want threats and bad publicity?
I’ve got plenty!
But who cares?
No big deal...
I want more !

I wanna be back there at NAIA Terminal 3
I wanna scream, wanna hear myself cursin’
Punching abound with my– fists, with no rest
My bottom is fish (I smell), my top is woman (I yell)

Down where Mon took the video (pictures), seeing me berating Bocboc and Ilagan
At a counter in the baggage claim area I was caught in the act
Now I'm the Tulfo brothers enemy – wish I could flee
Out of this world !

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Sin Bin


According to Wikipedia,  The sin bin (sometimes called the penalty box, bad box, or simply bin) is the area in ice hockey, rugby league, rugby union and some other sports where a player sits to serve the time of a given penalty, for an offense not severe enough to merit outright expulsion from the contest. Teams are generally not allowed to replace players who have been sent to the penalty box.

A player who has committed a foul can be sent to sit for a specified period.

The Tulfo brothers, Ben, Erwin and Raffy has recently been sent to the Sin Bin.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Thrilla In NAIA


It was the day Floyd Mayweather, Jr faced off with Miguel Cotto on the ring, but it turned out that another brawl got the limelight on May 6, as a columnist and a celebrity couple figured in a fistfight at the airport.

Do celebrities have any privacy nowadays? Is it unethical for people to take photos of stars in public places without their consent? This issue is brought to light once more following the brawl that transpired yesterday between Philippine Daily Inquirer columnist and TV5 host Ramon Tulfo and actor Raymart Santiago and wife actress Claudine Barretto at the Ninoy Aquino International Airport 3.

In plain view of passengers shuffling through Terminal 3 of the Ninoy Aquino International Airport, Tulfo,  Santiago and his wife, Barretto, got involved in a brief scuffle, which left Tulfo’s face swelling from the barrage of punches, and Barretto with a few bruises.