Chokoleit Wits Part 4

CHOKEY KA BA?

Chokoleit also has a list of his own versions of the popular question and answer pick-up lines:

“BOY: sampalok ka ba? MADAM URING: bakit, may asim pa ako? BOY: ka-korte ng katawan mo, at sa tigang mong yan, masarap ka isahog sa sinigang!”

“Traffic light ka ba, kase napapa-STOP ako at nag-aantay kelan ka READY at kelan ako GO! Kahit Bawal Tumawid gawin mo, kase Nakamamatay Dito!”

"Ketchup ka ba? Kase ikaw lang hinahanap para hotdog ko sumarap." -➣ Lumang Kolboy ☹☺”

“Eskwelahan ka ba, kase gusto kitang pasukan ng pasukan. Kasimpogi Gerald, perfect attendance agad! Kafez ni Bentong, suspended buong taon.☺☹”

"Chokey kahoy ka ba, kase ansarap mo sibakin...sa mukha!" Ganun ba, empleyado ka diba, mas masaya kung sa trabaho mo, sibakin ka sana,tseh!☺”

Chokoleit Wits Part 3

POLYGAMOUS POLITICS

He also takes time to comment on whats hot on the news. He said the recent turnabouts among political parties are amusing but tiring so he would like to lighten it up a bit with some of his “Twiticissms”.

“BREAKING NEWS: Breaking rules is breaking the law. Give us a break! This is Sokoleyt Sokulit, Breaking the Ice!”

“So what else is new? Pati linyang 'to gasgas na rin. Let me rephrase, who else knew? Mali ba? Or where else is now? Tama ba? Ewaaan! Lamonayan!☺”

“Nakakapagod pakinggan mga kontra-banat-depensa bawat partido Re: Arroyo's Arrest. Idaan ko na lang sa komentong komedya. Circus Carnival, Atbp.”

Chokoleit Wits Part 2

GIFT-GIVING

Christmas is the season for gift-giving, and Chokoleit is never gonna miss on the chance to share with us some jokes about this noble tradition:

“Nabasa ko sa card ng gift, To: YOU From: ME. Napaisip tuloy ako, niregaluhan ko ba sarili ko? O gusto ko lang subukan ma-surprise kunwari?☺☹”

“Valentine's day years ago. Kunwari may nagpadala flowers. Pa-girl pako,"Ay kanino galing?"Hindii na-rehearse si messenger,"Sa inyo po daw"☺☹”

“Eto pang klasik. Xmas years ago w/ my ex. Pa girl ulit, "Eh, asan na regalo mo saken?" Say ng ex "Di mo pa nga ako bingyan ng pambili eh".☺☹”

“Isa ko pang ex. Sabi ko, "May regalo nako sayo sa pasko, regaluhan mo din ako ha" Sabi pa, "Sure! hanggang tig-magkakano ba?" Xmas Party?☺☹”

Chokoleit Wits

EVERYTHING ABOUT CHOKOLEIT

I am perfectly imperfect.., forthright in my flaws.., sure of my insecurities. Absolute chaos. A beautiful disaster.✿

That is how Chokoleit describes himself in his Twitter profile.

Chokoleit, or Jonathan Aguilar Garcia in real life, is a TV and movie comedian actor, and stage comic who frequently performs at comedy bars and occasional guest appearances in several types of shows as what he once tweeted “rumaket na magpapatuloy pa mula pasko, town anniv, foundation day, patron fiesta, house blessing, binyag. kasal, kumpil, tuli atbp☺.”

I’ve been following a lot of personalities in Twitter, but his tweets are something to watch out for because they are definitely hilarious. Well, at least for my “eccentric” taste.

While the other stars tweet about what they are eating, the stuff they are buying, the places they are in or have been, the personalities they are seeing, etc., our Chokoleit also takes time to share with his followers a lot of inspirational sayings,words of wisdoms and plenty of his humorous insights on current events.

“Mababaw mang sabihin ang taste ko sa larangan ng komedya,
hindi ko ikakahiya na ako ay kanya talagang napapatawa
everytime na aking mababasa, mga tweets niya na ubod ng kaloka
hahalakhak ng todo-todo, at mapagkakamalang luka-luka”